Possibily the Saddest Day of My Mediocre Life - February 24, 2012
Today, Caitlyn Davis passed away.
I met her about a year, year and a half ago and I fell for her instantly. Unfortunately she had a girlfriend at the time and I was new to the strange feeling of love (let alone being in love with someone with the same gender as I) so I kept my feeling a supreme secret.
While my love was very taboo in more than one way I deeply admired her from a distance. Her musical laughter still runs through my mind. Her brown, doe eyes are bore into my sub-conscience. Everything about her was and still is absolute perfection to me. I swear to god, grass grew and the sun shone wherever she walked.
She was loved and accepted by all.
Her art and music is carved into my heart and it will be there forever. I promised her that I would never stop loving her. I haven’t broken that promise and I won’t. You never get over your first love.
I love you so much Caitie. You were such a beautiful girl. Your clever wit could make ANYONE laugh. Your smile was so contagious, everyone caught when they were around you.
I am in a swirling ocean of emotions because of this, Catie.
Hatred - to god for allowing this to happen
Sorrow - for I will never be able to hug you again or kiss you for the first time
Confused - because now I don’t know what to do with myself to get over this sudden shock.
Love - for you and your angelic smile.
I just don’t know what to do now, Catie. What do I do? My promise to you is to never forget. I will never forget your beautiful life no matter how short it was. You will be in my heart with me until I die. But, darling, after I die I will be able to see you again so I can finally tell you that I love you.
Are you happy where you are? Is it beautiful like you there? You do deserve the most beautiful heaven.
If you see her, I was supposed to be a twin and she should be there. Find her if you haven’t met her already. I know she would just love you.